fbpx

Writing a Parenting Plan: Smooth Transitions

Writing a parenting plan is very important when figuring out how your joint custody situation will work. It’s important to include things like your basic schedule. In addition, make sure to include things like holidays and vacations. Times when the schedule will be interrupted. You’ll also lay out a plan for expenses and how to pay for childcare. And finally, include how you’ll make big decisions. Consider things like what religion your children will be brought up in, curfew, diet, healthcare, school decisions, etc. You’ll need a plan in place so that you and your partner are on the same page with all major parenting decisions. Having a parenting plan in place will make your divorce much smoother and will help your children adjust to their new lives.

Writing a Parenting Plan: What to Include in Your Discussions

Schedule

One thing that’s important to include when writing a parenting plan is a basic schedule. This should involve how many days each parent has the children in a row, and what the schedule looks like. Include things like when and where you’ll transfer kids from one parent to another. Oftentimes, families use school as a way of transferring kids. For example, one parent drops them off and another picks them up. Remember that your plan can change as your children age.

Holidays and Vacations

In addition to the regular custody schedule, you should consider holidays and vacations when writing a parenting plan. These are times when the normal schedule might get interrupted. Decide how you’ll handle major holidays. Some parents choose to split them up throughout the year or switch years when each parent has the kids. Remember that when you go on vacation, you might need extra days. Don’t forget holidays like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day where you will most likely want to spend time with your children.

Expenses

Next, when writing a parenting plan, make sure to include a financial plan. You and your ex should decide on how you’ll be paying for childcare expenses. Include things like daycare, school supplies, and saving for college. You should include how you’ll handle any unexpected expenses that come up. For example, large medical bills. Try to factor in everyday expenses as well as larger expenses. Even though you don’t have to buy new sizes of clothes every day, the cost can still add up once or twice a year.

Important Decisions

Finally, one last thing to include when writing a parenting plan is how you’ll handle big decisions. You may want to go ahead and lay some ground rules as far as what your children’s futures will look like. Consider things like what religion you want to raise them in. What schools would you like them to attend? How will you each discipline and set boundaries for them? Don’t forget about things like curfew, diet, activities, and hobbies, and seeing friends and family.

Writing a parenting plan is important for figuring out how your life will look post-divorce. Make sure and include a basic schedule for custody as well as specifics for holidays and vacations. Include a financial plan for how you and your ex will pay for child-related expenses moving forward. And don’t forget about establishing ground rules for important decisions in the future. Creating a comprehensive parenting plan will help you in the future if any issues come up. It can also make the transition easier for your children when they go from living in one household with both parents to a split custody situation.

Choosing a Legal Guardian for Your Children

Choosing a legal guardian for your children can be a difficult decision, but it’s an important one. If you are making a will, you’ll need to designate a guardian for your kids. This is the person who will raise them if you and your spouse die. There are many things to consider when picking a guardian. You want to make sure that they have a similar lifestyle to you and will raise your children with the values that you’d like. In addition, you might consider whether they already have children. Also, take into account their financial situation and whether they can afford another child. And finally, don’t forget about their location and potentially moving your child. Knowing that you’ve chosen a legal guardian for your children can put your mind at ease.

Lifestyle

One thing to consider when choosing a legal guardian for your children is a lifestyle. While they don’t need to live exactly the way you do, your children must have some continuity. If you and your spouse intend to raise your kids in a specific religion, that’s also something to consider. All in all, the goal is to make the transition as smooth as possible for your children. And also to make sure you’ve designated somebody that will raise them the way you want them to be raised.

Other Children

Another thing to consider when choosing a legal guardian is whether or not they already have other children. If they don’t, it shouldn’t necessarily be a deal-breaker. But it helps to know that they have some experience with handling kids. In addition, consider that your child will now essentially have siblings that they live with.

Financial Situation

It’s also important to take into account the financial situation of anybody you appoint when choosing a legal guardian. You will likely leave your children some inheritance. If your children are minors, their guardians might have control over this. Make sure that you appoint somebody that you trust financially and who has the means to raise your child.

Location

Finally, when choosing a legal guardian, consider the location. Your child has grown up in a specific location surrounded by certain friends and family. They might already go to school and have friends there. Consider whether or not you’d want to uproot them and have them move to another city.

When choosing a legal guardian, there can be a lot to take into consideration. It’s important to weigh your options carefully because this is the person who will raise your kids in the event of your death. Make sure that it’s somebody you trust to instill the values that you’d like to raise your children with. In addition, consider if they have experience with kids and how many siblings your child will now be living with. Don’t forget that financial means are important too. And finally, consider where they live and if you are comfortable moving your child to a different city. Hopefully, you’ll be able to choose somebody that you trust wholeheartedly with the most important job in the world.

How You Can Help Foster Parents In Your Area

If you’re wondering how you can help foster parents in your area, there are many various ways to get involved. You don’t necessarily have to become a foster parent yourself. There are ways to be involved from afar. The best thing to do is to educate yourself on how the system works and what families in your area are needing at the moment. Another thing you can do is advocate for foster care and educate others on what it means. You can opt to support a family you know or find a local family. And finally, of course, you can donate to families in need. You can either donate money to local programs or donate goods to families needing things like diapers, clothes, and groceries. Hopefully, you can find a way to be involved that will help your community in a big way.

How You Can Help Foster Parents In Your Area: From Near or Far

Educate Yourself

The first thing to do if you want to help foster parents in your area is to educate yourself. There is so much to know about the foster care system. And many states work differently than others so it’s not one-size-fits-all. However, there is a lot of incorrect information out there about how fostering works. By learning more about how the program works, you can figure out the ways that you can help where it’s needed most.

Advocate

Another thing you can do if you want to help foster parents in your area is to advocate for them. Listen to what parents say they need from the system. They might also suggest changes that would be helpful. Unfortunately, there are a lot of problems with the system. And even more, unfortunately, children who inevitably fall through the cracks. The only way to fix anything is to get enough people to care about it enough to force change from higher up.

Support a Family

A more direct way that you can help if you want to help foster parents in your area is to support a few families. This might mean contributing financially or dedicating time to them. Often it’s the day-to-day things causing stress to foster parents. Things like forgetting to mow the lawn, needing to find time to grab groceries, or needing to coordinate transportation to and from activities. Volunteer to take something off a family’s plate. You can even train to become a respite caregiver, or babysitter to give the parents a break.

Donate

Finally, and probably obviously, if you want to help foster parents in your area, you can donate. Donating money to a local foster care program or family is a direct way to help them support their children. You can also donate items that are in high demand. For example, diapers, clothing, bedding, groceries, or toys. One thing that many foster children appreciate is a suitcase to keep their belongings in, as often they don’t even own one. If you don’t have the financial means to donate, you can always donate your time and volunteer with a local program.

There are many ways you can contribute if you want to help foster parents in your area. But the most important thing is to make sure that you listen to what they say they need. Educate yourself on how the fostering system works in your state. Help advocate for the types of change that parents say they need. You can also support a specific family or families near you by helping them with day-to-day chores or respite care. And finally, you can always donate money, helpful items, or time. There are many ways to volunteer with local foster programs, so just do a quick search in your area. Any bit of help that you can provide goes such a long way in improving the lives of the children and parents involved in foster care.

How to Make Split Custody Easier On Children

You can make split custody easier on your children by being communicative and civil with your ex-partner. A new schedule and lifestyle can be very difficult for children. They thrive on routine, so split custody can be a real shock to the system for them. It’s best if you can communicate early about what their schedule will look like. Keep a routine as much as possible, which means being civil with your ex. Give your children resources and space to ask questions and feel their emotions. And finally, if you and your ex have a relationship where this is possible: carve out some family time. Hopefully, you will come up with a custody situation that works well for your family and your children will adjust quickly and easily.

How to Make Split Custody Easier On Children: Adjusting to the New Normal

Communicate With Them

The first step to making split custody easier on children is to set expectations with them. Communicate exactly what is happening. Let them know what their new schedule will look like, and when they’ll be spending time with each of you. Be very reassuring that they are still loved and that the divorce has nothing to do with them. But it is good to explain the situation in clear terms that they can understand.

Keep a Routine

Children thrive on routine. Knowing what their day will look like helps them stay calm and feel in control. Make split custody easier on children by following a routine with them that you share with your ex. If you can keep their day-to-day as similar to before the divorce as possible, the better. This relies on you and your ex being civil with one another and communicating clearly. Try to keep their school day schedule, nap schedule, feeding schedule, and sleep schedule as similar as possible across your two homes.

Give Them Resources

Another way to help make split custody easier on children is to give them resources. Depending on their age, they may or may not feel comfortable confiding in you as a parent. Some children prefer to speak about their feelings with a counselor or therapist. Give them plenty of space to feel their emotions about your divorce. They may also have tough questions. Try to answer them truthfully in an age-appropriate way. And always avoid speaking negatively about your ex.

Carve Out Family Time

Finally, it can make split custody easier on children if you and your ex can get along long enough to do some family activities. While this doesn’t have to happen all the time, children typically do appreciate having time with their whole family together. If you and your ex can be civil with one another, perhaps you could carve out some family time. Aim for something that is not likely to bring up stress, like a walk in a park together or a movie.

Divorce is difficult for everybody involved, including children. You can make split custody easier on children by making sure to lay out what their new schedule will look like for them. They need time to mentally prepare for change just like adults do. Keep a routine as much as possible across your two homes. Also, try to give them resources to deal with their emotions if they seem like they are having a difficult time adjusting. And finally, if it’s possible with your ex, try to take some time for a family outing now and then. Hopefully, you and your ex can remain civil for the sake of your children. A co-parenting relationship is a tough one to maintain, but it’s important for your children’s well-being that you and your ex be civil to make the divorce easier on them.

How to Take on Sole Custody after Divorce

Taking on sole custody after divorce can be a big adjustment. It can seem overwhelming if you’ve been living together and suddenly are the only guardian. However, it’s important to remember that both you and your children will adjust in time to your new schedule. The most important thing is to get support. Hire a sitter or childcare provider so that you can take breaks sometimes. Listen to your children and their needs. Give yourself some slack and remember that things don’t have to be perfect all the time. It’s okay if the schedule gets a little messy for a few weeks or even months. Your children will bounce back quickly. And finally, have a backup plan in cases of emergency so that you are prepared for anything. Sole custody can seem overwhelming at first, but you will adjust soon enough.

How to Take on Sole Custody: A Big Adjustment

Get Support

The first thing to do when taking on sole custody after divorce is to get support. If you’ve been in a situation where there were two parents and now it’s just you, you’ll need some breaks. Plan to enroll your children in daycare or preschool, even if just part-time. If not, you could hire a nanny or babysitter to give you some breaks during the week. If you have any local family members, maybe they could watch the children now and then to give you a break. It’s important to take time for yourself to preserve your mental health. You can’t take care of your children as well if you’re completely exhausted.

Listen to Your Children

Another thing to remember when taking on sole custody after divorce is to listen to your children. Divorce is stressful for kids too. It’s a big upheaval for their lives as well. They may be emotional or have times when they need to talk to you about their feelings. Be a good listener to them and remember that this adjustment can be hard for them as well. It’s never good to bash your ex in front of your kids. Instead, continually remind them that they are well-loved and that their schedules will seem normal to them soon.

Give Yourself Some Slack

Taking on sole custody after divorce can get overwhelming, and parents can get bogged down easily. Don’t sweat the small stuff for a little while. The adjustment period is not the time to worry about whether your children are getting exactly the right nutrients or going down for naps at the same minute every day. Let them have a little extra screen time. Order takeout if you’re feeling exhausted. Try to remember that kids bounce back quickly from changes to their schedules. It’s ok to let things slide for a few weeks while you adjust to your new schedules.

Make Back-Up Plans

Finally, when taking on sole custody after divorce, make backup plans. You never know when you will get knocked down with a stomach bug or have some emergency come up at work. It’s good to have a solid list of caregivers you can call on if you need help spur of the moment. In addition, while it’s not fun to think about, it’s important to make legal plans as well. Update your will to reflect what will happen with your children if you were to become incapacitated or in an emergency. It’s important to have backup plans in case unpredictable things come up.

Winning sole custody after divorce can be a huge win. However, it does come with its stresses. Suddenly you are the sole caregiver to your children. Enlist some support from helpful friends and family or a babysitting service. Listen to your children to make sure that you are taking care of their emotional needs as well as physical needs. Don’t stress about everything on the schedule being perfect, just get through the adjustment period. And finally, make backup plans in cases of emergency. Sole custody can seem overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that it will seem normal to you in a short time. You and your children will adjust quickly to your new schedules.

Having the Divorce Talk with Your Children

Having the divorce talk with your children can be so daunting to think about. Their lives are certainly going to change. However, there is a reason for your divorce. You and your ex will be happier in the long run. And it will be best for your children to be raised by separated but happy parents rather than parents who are miserable because they stayed together. Pick the right time and place to have the conversation. Reassure them the whole time. Give them plenty of time to process what you’ve told them. And afterward, check-in and offer support. They will probably be upset but reassure them that they will get used to their new life in no time.

Having the Divorce Talk with Your Children

Pick the Right Time

Before having the divorce talk with your children, decide on an appropriate time and place. It’s really best to do this at home or someplace private. You don’t want to be overheard in a public place and your children might feel uncomfortable getting upset in public. Make sure that you have plenty of time to talk things over. You don’t interrupt or need to leave for work right afterward. It’s really best if you and your partner can have a conversation with your children together.

Reassure Them

Keep things simple but clear when having the divorce talk with your children. Let them know that you both still respect each other but that your marriage won’t work and you’ve decided you’d be happier living separately. Reassure them that they did not play any part in the divorce. Children will often blame themselves, so continue to repeat this. Also, reassure them that they will quickly adjust to having separated parents. And of course, continually remind them of how much you both love them.

Give Them Time to Process

After having the divorce talk with your children, give them time to process. Some children might have a hundred questions to ask. Or they might react angrily. Some children get very quiet and closed off. Let them process in their own way and give them time to do so. Don’t try to force them to talk about how they feel about it. They will probably come to you at some point to talk things over. If they react angrily, don’t get defensive. Children don’t need to know every detail that leads to your divorce. They simply need to know that you both still love and support them.

Check in and Offer Support

Finally, after having the divorce talk with your children, check-in and offer support. They may feel uncomfortable talking to you or your ex about their feelings. If this is the case, you can offer to set them up with a counselor or therapist to talk to. Offer constant support whenever they come to you. Remember to keep reminding them that it is not their fault and that you love them. In fact, it’s a good idea to keep offering support for a long time after you’ve split up.

Having the divorce talk with your children isn’t easy. But if the divorce will be better for them in the long run, then you need to have a conversation with them about everything. Wait until you have plenty of uninterrupted time and privacy to tell them about your split. Reassure them constantly and for a long time afterward that they are not at fault and that you love them. Give them time and space to process everything you’ve said. And check in with them afterward and offer them support whenever they need it. It will be a painful conversation. But hopefully, you will all move on quickly and get into a new routine that works for your family.