The emotional damage of infidelity can last many years or even a lifetime. If your spouse cheats, it can change the way you see the world and lead to scars that take a lot of work to heal. Many people experience a range of emotions after an affair, from anger to grief, and everything in between. Self-blame is not uncommon and it can take a long time to rebuild your self-confidence after infidelity. Grief is also very common because your relationship is going to be different. Many victims of a cheating spouse also have trouble with trusting future partners and can develop anxiety in other relationships. While you might be able to salvage the marriage, it’s okay to give yourself permission to take time to process all of the emotional fallout from the affair.
The Emotional Damage of Infidelity: Lasting Scars
Self-Blame
One of the most common types of emotional damage from infidelity is self-blame. Victims of cheating usually begin questioning why the affair happened in the first place. Often the only reason they can come up with is some sort of shortcoming on their end. However, self-blame isn’t fair to yourself. Your partner decided to cheat all on their own. And while you can’t change the past, you can change the way you talk to yourself and try to remember that you are not at fault for your spouse’s poor lack of judgment.
Grief
Another form of emotional damage from infidelity is grief. You might be able to salvage your marriage and even build it back into a strong relationship. However, the marriage that you had is over. Something will always be fundamentally different between you. And it’s okay to take some time to process the grief that comes from any type of loss.
Distrust
Distrust is one of the most common forms of emotional damage from infidelity that victims of cheating experience. It can be difficult to be vulnerable with future partners ever again. Especially if you were completely blind-sided by the affair. However, try to remember that the actions of your spouse don’t indicate what another partner will do.
Anxiety
Finally, cheating can create a lot of anxiety. If your spouse has an affair, it can take you by surprise and fundamentally change the way that you see the world. This can create a lot of stress and make you feel like you suddenly doubt other things that you took for granted. Finding a healthy outlet for your anxiety, talking things through with a friend, or reaching out to a therapist can help you with managing stress.
The emotional damage of infidelity is far-reaching and can touch other aspects and relationships in your life. Being the victim of a cheating spouse can create lasting scars that take a lot of time and a lot of personal growth to heal. It’s essential to try to avoid placing the blame on yourself. Additionally, give yourself plenty of time to grieve the marriage that you had. Even if you can rebuild your relationship and move on, it’s okay to realize that things will never be quite the same. It’s also important to try to not take the mistrust that you experience into future relationships. And to learn ways of coping with the anxiety and stress that can come from being the victim of an affair. Hopefully, you will be able to move forward while healing from the emotional wounds of infidelity.