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Birthday parties with shared custody can be a little tricky to navigate. Everybody wants their children’s birthday to be extra special. So when you have to split your time with your kids, it can be hard to know the best way to handle their birthdays. Some people choose to work together to throw a joint birthday party. Others split up the day half and a half so that one parent sees the birthday kid in the morning, and the other gets them at night. A yet others simply throw two different birthdays! A lot depends on the relationship you have with your co-parent, finances, and your locations. But the most important thing is that you and your ex put aside your feelings and tension so that your child can have the most special birthday possible.

Birthday Parties with Shared Custody: Figuring Out Your Schedule

Share the Day

Birthday parties with shared custody can be complicated, so there are lots of ways to handle them. If you and your ex get along reasonably well, you can simply share the day with your kids. Plan a party together and attend the party as a family. If you are prone to getting into dramatic standoffs with your ex, this is not the option for you. But as long as you can get along (at least for a little while) you can spend your special day together with your child.

Split the Day

Other couples handle birthday parties with shared custody by splitting up the day. This works well if you live near each other. One parent keeps the children in the morning, and then the parents switch off in the afternoon. That way, each parent gets a chance to see their child on their actual birthday. You can even swap off at the party with one parent setting up and attending for the first half, and then the other parent switching off and handling cleanup after.

Double Up

Finally, for ex-couples that do not interact very peacefully or for exes that live far apart, some choose to handle birthday parties with shared custody by doubling up. Each parent gets to celebrate the children’s birthdays separately. Each year you can switch out who has the child on the actual day of their birth. This option is often a win-win for children because they get to have two parties!

The Bottom Line

However you choose to handle birthday parties with shared custody, the bottom line is that you and your ex need to set aside your differences for the sake of your children. You might have a lot of bitter feelings, but on this day only, it’s all about your birthday child. Try to get along as peacefully as you can so that your child can have a great day.

There are lots of ways to handle birthday parties with shared custody. A lot depends on the relationship that you have with your ex-spouse, and whether you can get along at all. It also depends on how close you live to one another, and of course, your financial situation. Some parents choose to throw one birthday party together for their kids. Others choose to switch off so that they don’t have to overlap very much. And yet others choose to have entirely separate celebrations with their children. It’s up to you to decide which way fits your family’s situation the best. However, the most important thing to remember is that this day isn’t about you and your ex-spouse, it’s about your child. So remember to put their feelings first and make this day as special as it can be.