Every couple argues sometimes. And children need to see that parents can sometimes have minor conflicts that they resolve. However, if your fighting has become destructive, it’s important to stop arguing in front of your children. Constant arguing in front of your children can affect them negatively in many different ways. It creates a stressful atmosphere for them which can cause short and long-term issues. In addition, they may feel insecure because of constant arguments. They might develop hostility or anger which can harm their relationships in the future. And finally, your relationship with your children might suffer as well. While it’s normal for couples to argue every now and then, if you feel that the arguing is constant and highly combative, it’s best to make sure you are not being overheard by young ears.

Arguing in Front of Your Children: Negative Effects It Can Have on Your Kids


Arguing in front of your children can create a very stressful atmosphere for them. The raised voices and emotions feel even more overwhelming to a child’s ears than they do adults. Children usually think that raised voices mean they are in trouble, whether or not they’re directed at them. So if you and your spouse are shouting, even if the child is not remotely involved, they can internalize all that anger as being pointed at them. In addition, they don’t know how to cope with strong emotions. So seeing you angry and having emotional outbursts can scare them.


Arguing in front of your children can also create feelings of insecurity. They may wonder whether or not their family is going to stay together. Older children often wonder whether or not their parents will be getting a divorce. This uncertainty can make children feel helpless and confused. This insecurity can have long-term effects on their self-confidence later in life. In addition, they may not build trust with others as easily.


Hostility is another negative effect of arguing in front of your children. If your kids see you and your spouse being angry or saying hurtful things, they may think that that is the only way to deal with conflict. This can have very negative impacts on their relationships later in life. If they don’t see you and your spouse dealing with conflict in a healthy way, they’ll never know how to do it themselves. Even younger children can display more hostility if they’re exposed to a lot of arguing.

Relationship Damage

Finally, one final negative consequence of arguing in front of your children is that it can harm your relationship with them. If you and your partner are constantly arguing, you’re more likely to be in a bad mood. This in turn can make you short-tempered or less patient with your kids. They may even feel like they are not a priority. Sometimes, even without realizing it, parents take out their frustrations with other things on their children. All of this can harm your overall relationship with your kids.

All in all, arguing in front of your children can be very harmful both in the short term and even later in their life. It can affect their relationships for years to come. If they see constant conflict, it can create a very stressful environment for them. In addition, they may feel insecure about their family. All of this can result in increased hostility and them not knowing how to healthily handle conflict in their own relationships. And finally, arguing can hurt your relationship with your own kids. If you and your partner are arguing constantly, make sure that your kids are not within earshot. In addition, it might be best to seek professional help in order to learn how to deal with conflicts in a healthy way.