When it comes to co-parenting, scheduling is one of the keys to success. But, that’s not to say it comes easy. Co-parenting successfully is extremely difficult, especially depending on the details of your divorce. But, by creating an organized co-parenting calendar, you can make your lives that much easier. Co-parenting with your ex may feel difficult right now, and it may always seem that way, but putting it all in writing? Makes the plan much easier to deal with.
Organized Co-Parenting Calendar: How to Make it and Move on
Think of all those events you want your child there for; Grandma’s birthday, your favorite sport’s game of the year, a school play… Whatever it may be. Think of all these things before you and the other co-parent meet, and put it in writing. Ask the other parent to do the same. You want to essentially have made your part of the schedule before you two ever come together. This should include any engagements you have, as well as the child, such as science fairs, sports games, business trips, travel, or the like. Then, when you come together, you can compare and build a cohesive schedule to both go off of.
Another key to an organized co-parenting calendar is to be careful not to overbook. Often times, after going through a divorce, we want to make up for the fact that we are spending less time with our kid. So it’s not uncommon to overcompensate by agreeing to do anything and everything. But overbooking can leave you tired, stretched to the max, and ultimately unreliable. When you overbook yourself, you will at some point have to cancel or miss something. But the last thing you want to do is create a pattern of not fulfilling your parenting responsibilities. So, it’s best to only agree to what you know you will be able to do.
Set a Reminder
No matter how many times you talk about it, or write it in colored ink on the calendar, it’s hard to juggle your schedule. During your marriage, you and your spouse probably maintained a system for the schedule. You knew who was picking who up at what time. And if not, you probably talked throughout the day so that someone always remembered. But since your divorce, these things can be harder to keep up with. Therefore, set a reminder on your phone for those visits or events you planned with your kid. We’d all like to think we’ll remember easily. However, sometimes it’s just plain difficult. So, make a plan, set reminders, and stick to it. As we’ve said, you don’t want to create a pattern of not fulfilling your duties as a parent.
Keep multiple copies and allow for it flex a bit
We can’t account for every little bump in the road. So, take your agreement seriously, print and sign a copy for the each of you, but understand that things will happen. On your end, as well as theirs, there’s always the potential of something that might alter your agreement. Maybe one of you ends up with an illness, wrecks your car, gets a big promotion, or something of the like. Allow for your agreement to move just a bit if that time comes. But, understand that these occurrences should be discussed between both of you.
The key to an organized co-parenting calendar, is collaboration. Co-parenting, as well as planning, is difficult to do. But when you commit, take the time, and prioritize your child, it’s amazing what you can accomplish together.