Feb 12, 2023 | Divorce, Financial Impact of Divorce
Divorce can be both stressful and somewhat costly. As a result, you may find that you need some financial support post-divorce. It’s important to know what your options are, and how you can even ask those close to you for help…
How to Ask for Financial Support Post-Divorce: Helpful Steps
Explore your choices
When you’re looking for financial support post-divorce, it’s good to consider what your choices are. For example, some people may turn to their bank for a loan. While these can be helpful in the moment, how much you can receive will depend on things like your credit score. This will also impact any sort of interest rate you’ll need to deal with.
If your work has laid you off, then you can also seek out unemployment benefits. These will help you get some cash flow while you look for a new job. However, many will wonder about asking their friends and family. While they may have helped you before, bringing money into the mix can complicate things, so it’s good to know how to make this process easier for everyone.
Be prepared
If you want to ask your friends and family for financial support post-divorce, you need to be prepared. Just going to them and asking for money will get you nowhere and strain your relationship. Rather, if you really want their help, you should show them that by getting yourself ready.
In particular, it’s good to set up a budget and spending plan. Figure out just exactly how much money you may need and for what. It’s also helpful to see if there’s any sort of debt forgiveness or restructuring you can do too. When you prepare like this, it shows your friends and family that you’re serious about using the money properly.
Set up terms
You shouldn’t treat getting financial support post-divorce from friends and family any differently than you would from other places. It can be easy to think that because you know each other, that it doesn’t need to be as serious. However, when money is involved, you want to make sure both sides know and understand what’s expected of the other.
In fact, even if they say they don’t want you to pay them back, it’s good to tell them you will. This creates some accountability on your end and ensures you’ll use the money to get yourself situation. Once you are, you can then pay them back, even if it was just a small amount they gave you.
Feb 5, 2023 | Divorce
While it’s painful to think about, sometimes divorce is the best option for couples who are no longer happy in their marriage. Unfortunately, there is often still a lot of guilt surrounding the decision, especially if you have children. However, there is no need to feel ashamed of making a decision that is best for your family and your future. If you have tried marriage counseling and things aren’t working, it might be time to move forward with divorce. Similarly, if you are the only partner putting in any effort or if there is a lack of trust between you and your spouse. And sometimes, people just move in different directions with their lives and realize that they are no longer compatible. Whatever the reason for your divorce, there’s no reason to feel a stigma about the decision. Be confident that you are choosing the best future for yourself.
Sometimes Divorce is the Best Option: Letting Go of Guilt
Counseling Isn’t Working
One of the reasons why sometimes divorce is the best option is if couples have tried marriage counseling but things aren’t improving. It might be because of a communication breakdown, or might simply be that you have different goals in life. Whatever the disconnect is, if you’ve given it your best try and it’s still not improving, it might be time to let go.
No Effort
Divorce is the best option if you are the only one putting any effort into the relationship as well. Marriage requires teamwork, and you and your spouse both need to be equally committed. Unfortunately, if you are the only one making space in your life for marriage, it might be time to call it quits. You deserve an equal partner that is willing to put in the effort to make a relationship last.
Broken Trust
Another reason why sometimes divorce is the best option for couples is if there is a lack of trust. This often happens after an affair, especially if the adultery happens several times. If you no longer trust your partner, or you feel your partner doesn’t trust you, it might be time to discuss divorce. A marriage cannot last if you and your spouse don’t have faith in one another.
Letting Go of Guilt
There are tons of reasons why people get divorced. And sometimes, it’s simply that they’ve grown apart. Whatever the reasons are, there are times when divorce is the best option. However, even if this is the case, it can still come with a lot of guilt. It’s important to remember that choosing your happiness is perfectly fine and not something you should feel ashamed of. If you have children, it’s important to remember that staying together for their sake if you’re unhappy isn’t modeling a healthy relationship. Having two co-parents who get along is better for them in the long run than living with two parents who argue.
While it’s difficult to accept, some marriages simply aren’t meant to be. If you and your spouse are drifting apart, it might be time to examine whether or not divorce is the best option for you. Try not to let guilt or stigma be a factor in your decision. Instead, think about what you want for your future and what sort of partner you deserve in life. If you and your spouse have tried counseling to no avail, or if you feel like you’re the only one putting in the effort, it might be time to break up. Additionally, if there is a lack of trust between you, you might need to move forward with a divorce. Hopefully, you and your spouse can come to the best decision for your family and move forward amicably with whatever you choose.
Dec 4, 2022 | Divorce, Family Law
Adjusting spousal support, or alimony can be a complicated process. In South Carolina, some alimony payments last a lifetime because they are “periodic alimony,” or permanent alimony. This is the most common form of alimony. However, there are a few instances where these supports might change. Death, marriage, or moving in with a partner might change alimony, as can a substantial change in circumstances. However, there are specific rules about changing these payments. Therefore, the best thing to do if you want to try to change alimony payments is to speak to an attorney. They can assist you in going through the proper legal channels and can do their best to get your alimony payments where they ought to be.
Adjusting Spousal Support in SC: Changing Alimony
What is Spousal Support?
Spousal support, or alimony, is the money that one spouse pays to another after a divorce. This money is typical to help the receiving spouse maintain the same lifestyle after the split. When deciding on how much spousal support to award, a judge takes into account many factors. For example, each person’s income and needs. Adjusting spousal support can be a tricky process because alimony is typically permanent in South Carolina.
Reasons for Adjusting or Terminating Spousal Support
While most alimony is permanent, adjusting spousal support is possible in a few scenarios. For example, if either spouse passes away, alimony support stops and does not pass on to heirs. In addition, if the receiving spouse re-marries or lives with a new partner for more than ninety days, the alimony payments also terminate. And finally, if there is a substantial change in circumstances.
More About Substantial Changes
Adjusting spousal support because of a substantial change in circumstances can be proved in a number of different ways. For example, if either the sending or receiving spouse has a change in salary or income it can change alimony. Or if either has a new health issue arises. If the spouse receiving payments inherits a large sum of money, it might mean a reduction in support payments. The change must be unexpected and new since the time of the divorce.
First Steps
Adjusting spousal support is best left to your family law attorney. They can help guide you through the process to get the results that you want and deserve. If you believe that your payments should be reduced, or if you want to defend against an ex trying to reduce payments, it’s important to get legal representation.
Adjusting spousal support is not very common in some states, South Carolina among them. Most alimony payments in South Carolina are permanent, or periodic alimony. However, there are a few circumstances where you might be able to reduce payments. For example, if either partner dies or if the receiving spouse gets remarried or moves in with a new partner. Or if either party can prove a significant change in circumstances. Many factors go into proving these facts, so the best course of action is to engage an experienced family law attorney as soon as possible. They can assist you in proving your case and getting the results that you deserve when it comes to adjusting alimony.
Aug 14, 2022 | Divorce, Family Law
Many factors can affect the cost of divorce, and some depend on the state that you live in. However, there are several that almost always can raise the price of your litigation. If you have children and need to figure out a custody situation, that almost always makes your divorce more complicated. In addition, complicated assets or properties can drive up the price. A lot depends on you and your ex’s ability to compromise on issues. The more you can agree on up front, the quicker things can get resolved. And this will in turn keep your costs lower. There are many factors affecting the overall price of divorce, but your ability to compromise will help you save money.
Factors that Affect the Cost of Divorce: Keeping Your Costs Lower
Custody
One of the factors that almost always affects the cost of divorce is custody. If you and your ex have children, you’ll be needing to figure out a custody arrangement. This almost always gets complicated, and in turn, can take a long time. Parents want the best for their children, and emotions can run high. But the longer that litigation goes on, the higher the bill.
Complicated Assets
Another factor that can increase the cost of divorce is your assets. If you have complicated assets, stocks, or many properties, it can make things more expensive. This is because it takes longer to figure out all of their value, and how to split them fairly. If you and your ex own any companies together, this can also complicate matters.
Ability to Compromise
Your ability to compromise is the thing that affects the cost of your divorce the most. The more that you and your ex can agree on up front, the better off you’ll be money-wise. If you can figure out how you want to handle things in mediation without having to go to court, you’ll save yourself even more money. The quicker you can resolve issues, the less time you’ll be billed.
Other Factors
Many factors affect the cost of divorce, some that you can control, and some that you can’t. For example, the state that you live in will have some effect on your settlement costs. In addition, your costs also depend on who you choose as your divorce attorney. But remember, you get what you pay for, and attorneys are no exception. While you might spend more money upfront to hire a more experienced divorce attorney, the settlement they get for you will probably be worth it.
Figuring out the cost of divorce is nearly impossible to do from the beginning. However, many attorneys can give you an overall estimate of what to expect. A lot depends on your unique situation. However, across the board, there are some things that almost always raise the price. Custody battles generally make things more expensive, as well as having a complicated estate or assets. If you and your ex are unable to compromise on anything, it can make your litigation take much longer to resolve. And this can increase the price. Hiring excelling representation can also be expensive, but likely will get you the settlement you want. The bottom line is that divorce is expensive for everybody, but the more you and your ex can compromise on, the lower you’ll keep your costs.
Jul 31, 2022 | Divorce, Marriage
It can feel not easy to make time for your marriage, especially if you have young children. However, it’s incredibly important for you and your spouse to reconnect. The best way to make time for your partner is to put it on your calendar. If you need childcare, don’t feel guilty about hiring a babysitter or asking for help from a friend. And remember, it’s not about the quantity of the time, it’s about the quality. Make a more concentrated effort to connect with your spouse and set aside other distractions. Hopefully, even with little children, you and your partner can find the time to make your marriage a priority.
How to Make Time for Your Marriage: Even with Young Children
Realize the Importance
The only way to make time for your marriage if you have young children is to realize how essential it is. Our lives get so busy, that it’s easy to allow relationships to take a back seat. However, every marriage needs effort and dedication. You can prioritize your relationship by showing appreciation for one another, communicating, and spending quality time together.
Put It in Your Calendar
The best way to make time for your marriage is to put it on your calendar. Physically blocking out a specific time during the week to reconnect with your spouse will help you both make it a habit. Don’t let other things take priority, but instead, make that time set in stone for each other.
Hire Help
While you can make time for your marriage by having a date night at home, sometimes it’s nice to get out of the house. Especially if you also work remotely. Hire a sitter for a few hours so that you and your spouse can have alone time where you know you won’t be interrupted. If a sitter isn’t an affordable option, see if a friend or family member will help out.
Make it Quality Time
Finally, when you do make time for your marriage, make sure that it’s quality time. Put aside your cell phones for a bit so that you can re-connect distraction-free. Try to take an interest in your partner’s life. Communication is all about becoming a better listener. When you set aside a specific time in the day to reconnect, it can prevent tensions from building up and bubbling over.
If you have young children, it might feel like you never have time for yourself, let alone your partner. However, it’s incredibly important to make time for your marriage so that you can re-connect with your spouse. It’s far too easy to begin to feel like roommates with one another, rather than partners in a marriage. So put quality time on your schedule and carve out some time each week to communicate with one another. Hire a sitter or ask a friend to watch your kids so that you won’t be distracted. And finally, put away your phones so that you can focus on one another. The years with young children can be difficult for a marriage, but if you both put effort into reconnecting, you can make your marriage even stronger.
Jul 24, 2022 | Divorce
If you think your spouse is cheating, it can be devastating for your marriage. However, an affair is a big deal and something that hopefully neither you nor your partner takes lightly. Accusing them of cheating can be hurtful if they aren’t, so it’s important to get a clear head before you try to confront them. Make a list of the reasons why you suspect the cheating. Get a second opinion from a trusted friend or family member. Decide how you feel about the situation in general, and whether or not you’re ready to know the truth. If you still feel like your partner might be cheating, the only way to know for sure is to ask them. Calmly confront them and try to get to the bottom of it. Hopefully, you and your spouse can work through whatever happens next together.
I Think My Spouse is Cheating, Now What? Gathering Evidence
Make a List
If you think your spouse is cheating, it can be helpful to try to get a little space. Please make a list of all the reasons why you think they might be cheating and all the reasons why you think they are loyal. Then take a few days and try to take a little time for yourself to get your head clear. After that, revisit the list and see if the reasons still seem legitimate. Sometimes, we panic and start making more out of small situations. Getting a little space can often bring this to light and release some anxiety.
Get a Second Opinion
Another thing you can do if you suspect that your spouse is cheating is to get a second opinion. However, accusing somebody of infidelity is a bell that you can’t unring. So be careful who you confide in. You might want to speak to a therapist or a close friend that you know will keep your confidence. They can help you decide if you are jumping to conclusions that might not be true.
Decide How You Feel
If you feel sure that your spouse is cheating, it’s essential to take some time before you confront them to process your feelings. Decide whether or not this is a truth that you want to know. Get support from somebody you trust, or speak with a therapist to help you prepare for how you might feel if you find out that it’s true. When you feel like you are ready to learn one way or the other, it’s time to confront them.
Confront Them
There’s no other way to find out whether or not your spouse is cheating other than to confront them about it and ask. Try to pick a time when you are both calm and won’t be interrupted, and set them down for a serious discussion. Don’t throw out your accusation in the middle of an argument. Ask about how your spouse is feeling about your relationship and whether there is anything they’d like to tell you. Finally, you can mention your fears and the reasons why you suspect that they’re having an affair. Hopefully, they will be truthful with you, whatever the case.
If you think your spouse is cheating, it can create confusion and panic. It’s easy to spin out of control with these kinds of thoughts and psyche yourself out. It can be helpful to take a little time to relax and collect yourself. Write down the reasons why you think your partner is cheating, and then revisit them in a few days to see if they seem silly or not. Confide in a close friend for a second opinion, but make sure they can keep your confidence. Before you confront your partner about it, decide if you’re ready to hear the truth. Then, ask them directly in a calm conversation. Hopefully, whether the answer is yes or no, you and your spouse will be able to move forward in a way that makes sense for both of you.
