Jun 9, 2024 | Divorce
Prenuptial agreements seem to get a pretty bad rap, but are they as bad as people make them out to be? There are many things people do not know or understand about prenuptial agreements, or ‘prenups’. Are they just for the rich and famous? Are they unfair? Do they mean you do not trust your partner? Let’s break down what they are so that you will know if you should get a prenup.
Prenuptial Agreement: Necessary Pre-Wedding Decisions
What are Prenups?
When you are planning a wedding, whether you should get a prenup may be the last thing you want to think about. While some people associate these arrangements with someone already having their mind on divorce, prenups can actually be a smart decision for both parties. A prenuptial agreement will go over how a couple will split their finances. Also, it lays out what each person came into the marriage with and how they would split their assets and debts.
You can customize these agreements to fit your needs. They can even have verbiage written in that the arrangement expires after kids come into the picture, or after you have been married and built a life together after a certain number of years. Even if you don’t want to think of it this way, marriage is ultimately a contract between two people. If that contract ends without any provisions, your assets will be split right down the middle, no matter what anyone came into the marriage with. In a way, they are like an insurance policy. You hope you never have to use it but it can protect you if you do need to use it.
Assets
There are many reasons why some would consider a prenup, and they do not all include being married to a celebrity. Anyone can get a prenuptial agreement. For example, one or both parties could have already been married previously. Therefore, they could come into the marriage with children, child support, or multiple properties that you do not want to get mixed in with other finances. While there are wills for this too, a prenuptial arrangement can also ensure assets will be set aside for their children.
Coming into a marriage, one spouse could have a lot more wealth, or a lot more debt, than the other. A prenup can actually protect you from assuming half of your spouse’s pre-marital debt in the event of a divorce. This also can apply to keeping a business separate if a spouse had it before coming into the marriage.
Other Reasons for Prenups
Some people marry quickly, after knowing each other only a short time. In this case, you may not know your spouse very well. You may decide that you should get a prenuptial agreement in order to protect yourself in this case. Fortunately, you can make amendments to these arrangements after you are married. Therefore, are not locked into anything written in the prenup if you decide to change it later.
If you are still unsure if you should get a prenuptial agreement, you could talk with a marriage counselor. Remember, signing a prenup does not mean you are going into the marriage expecting a divorce. It really is just a smart decision that can protect both parties.
Feb 18, 2024 | Divorce, Family Law
Divorce can often leave people questioning their self-esteem. Re-building confidence after a divorce is important so that you can begin to get back to living your best life. You can also have more confidence to grow and begin this new chapter of your life on a positive note. Try to refocus on old hobbies or passions that make you feel happy. Reconnecting with old friends can also boost your confidence. Many people find positive affirmations to be extremely helpful with boosting self-confidence. And finally, reach out and get help from a therapist if you feel like it would be helpful. Divorce can shatter your self-confidence, but it’s important to gain it back so you can focus on the exciting adventures to come.
Re-Building Confidence After a Divorce: Get Your Groove Back
Refocus on Old Hobbies
One way to rebuild confidence after a divorce is to re-focus on old hobbies or passions. Oftentimes, divorce can be extremely time-consuming and stressful. It’s hard to make time for hobbies. Now that your divorce is final, you can try to get back to hobbies you care about. If you’re a talented painter, make time to paint. Or try to find a new hobby like yoga or meditation. Finding things you’re passionate about can really boost your self-confidence as you hone new skills.
Reconnect with Old Friends
Another way to rebuild confidence after a divorce is to reconnect with old friends. You might have lost touch with people in the stress of the divorce process. If that’s the case, take the time now to reach out to them. For example, ask a friend to dinner or for a quick coffee. They can help you process your feelings about the divorce. It’s also confidence-boosting to be around people you care about and who respect you.
Positive Affirmations
Many people find positive affirmations to be very helpful in rebuilding confidence after a divorce. Affirmations are positive statements you say to yourself repeatedly to reprogram your brain to focus on positivity instead of negative self-talk. Many people find it helpful to write them where they’ll be seen frequently. For example, on the bathroom mirror so that they see them each morning as soon as they wake up. It could be something as simple as “I am worth loving.” Conversely, it could be something specific to yourself like “I will name three things I’m grateful for each morning as I brush my teeth.”
Get Help
Re-building confidence after a divorce can be difficult. Sometimes it’s hard to figure it out on your own. Try reaching out to a therapist or counselor. They’ll be able to help you with negative self-talk and self-doubt. They can often recommend ideas for boosting self-confidence. In addition, it can be very helpful just to have another person to vent your feelings to. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a professional for help.
Divorce can be very damaging to your self-confidence. If you’ve realized that you now have lower self-esteem it’s important to re-build confidence after a divorce. Re-focus on old hobbies or passions. Finding things that you’re good at can boost your confidence. Next, re-connect with old friends with who you’ve lost touch. In addition, many people find positive affirmations to be helpful with self-confidence. And finally, get help from a professional. A therapist or counselor is a great resource to use if you’re struggling with low self-esteem. If you can build back your self-confidence after a divorce, you can move on to the next exciting stage of life.
Jan 4, 2024 | Co-parenting, Divorce
Taking on sole custody after divorce can be a big adjustment. It can seem overwhelming if you’ve been living together and suddenly are the only guardian. However, it’s important to remember that both you and your children will adjust in time to your new schedule. The most important thing is to get support. Hire a sitter or childcare provider so that you can take breaks sometimes. Listen to your children and their needs. Give yourself some slack and remember that things don’t have to be perfect all the time. It’s okay if the schedule gets a little messy for a few weeks or even months. Your children will bounce back quickly. And finally, have a backup plan in cases of emergency so that you are prepared for anything. Sole custody can seem overwhelming at first, but you will adjust soon enough.
How to Take on Sole Custody: A Big Adjustment
Get Support
The first thing to do when taking on sole custody after divorce is to get support. If you’ve been in a situation where there were two parents and now it’s just you, you’ll need some breaks. Plan to enroll your children in daycare or preschool, even if just part-time. If not, you could hire a nanny or babysitter to give you some breaks during the week. If you have any local family members, maybe they could watch the children now and then to give you a break. It’s important to take time for yourself to preserve your mental health. You can’t take care of your children as well if you’re completely exhausted.
Listen to Your Children
Another thing to remember when taking on sole custody after divorce is to listen to your children. Divorce is stressful for kids too. It’s a big upheaval for their lives as well. They may be emotional or have times when they need to talk to you about their feelings. Be a good listener to them and remember that this adjustment can be hard for them as well. It’s never good to bash your ex in front of your kids. Instead, continually remind them that they are well-loved and that their schedules will seem normal to them soon.
Give Yourself Some Slack
Taking on sole custody after divorce can get overwhelming, and parents can get bogged down easily. Don’t sweat the small stuff for a little while. The adjustment period is not the time to worry about whether your children are getting exactly the right nutrients or going down for naps at the same minute every day. Let them have a little extra screen time. Order takeout if you’re feeling exhausted. Try to remember that kids bounce back quickly from changes to their schedules. It’s ok to let things slide for a few weeks while you adjust to your new schedules.
Make Back-Up Plans
Finally, when taking on sole custody after divorce, make backup plans. You never know when you will get knocked down with a stomach bug or have some emergency come up at work. It’s good to have a solid list of caregivers you can call on if you need help spur of the moment. In addition, while it’s not fun to think about, it’s important to make legal plans as well. Update your will to reflect what will happen with your children if you were to become incapacitated or in an emergency. It’s important to have backup plans in case unpredictable things come up.
Winning sole custody after divorce can be a huge win. However, it does come with its stresses. Suddenly you are the sole caregiver to your children. Enlist some support from helpful friends and family or a babysitting service. Listen to your children to make sure that you are taking care of their emotional needs as well as physical needs. Don’t stress about everything on the schedule being perfect, just get through the adjustment period. And finally, make backup plans in cases of emergency. Sole custody can seem overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that it will seem normal to you in a short time. You and your children will adjust quickly to your new schedules.
Dec 23, 2023 | Divorce, Family Law
Some divorcees never speak to one another again after the divorce is finalized. Other divorcees may be cordial to their exes. However, there are occasional cases where exes actually get back together after their divorce. This could happen over months, or even years, after the split. If the problems in your divorce are reversible, then with some hard work and time, there is a chance you could reconcile with your ex after divorce.
How-to: Reconcile with Your Ex After Divorce: Mending Broken Bonds
Reconciliation
Reconciliation does not always mean that you will remarry your ex. It could also just mean moving towards a friendly relationship and moving past your anger and hurt. While it may take time to reconcile with your ex, it is possible to do. Not everyone wants to live their life feeling bitter and angry for the rest of their lives. It is not uncommon for someone to still even be in love with their ex. Divorce gives people space and distance to really think and envision their lives. They may even be able to see workable solutions to the problems that caused them to split in the first place.
Communication
If you want to reconcile with your ex, first start by trying to increase communication with them. However, do not harass them. Instead, make sure that they want to communicate with you too. Have open, honest communication with them. If you think that your divorce was a mistake, they may also feel the same way.
In the same way that you did when you first started dating, show interested in your ex and the things they are involved in. Talk through the revelations you have made about your relationship, and tell them the things you are doing to work towards making positive changes.
Move Slowly
Remember that there were reasons that you and this person ended up getting divorced in the first place. These issues are not just going to instantly vanish overnight. This is why you should proceed cautiously and carefully. Sure, this could be a new beginning, but you can not forget that you also have a history that needs to be addressed. Carefully consider this, and work towards a resolution together.
It is a good idea to see a counselor or therapist in this situation. You should try and work on the traits, habits, and emotions that may have contributed or led to the marital issues in the first place. Additionally, you should talk to a couples therapist together. This third-party can help determine if it is a good idea for you to get back together. If not, they can also help you come to terms with the divorce as well.
Nov 13, 2023 | Divorce, Family Law
Ending a marriage can come in several different forms. There is a difference between divorce, separation and annulment. They all mean different things. Here are some of their differences.
Ending a Marriage: Divorce, Separation and Annulment
Divorce
A divorce is when a couple goes through the process of legally ending a marriage before either spouse has passed away. There are many different reasons that a couple may choose to get a divorce. Each state may handle the divorce process differently. Once a divorce is finalized, the two people are no longer legally bound to each another. This opens up the ability for either or both people to remarry or enter into a domestic partnership.
Annulment
When someone gets an annulment, it is a way of ending a marriage that states that the marriage is null and void. Annulments are not granted very often. An exception to this is when a court finds that a marriage is not valid. Reasons that could warrant an annulment are duress, fraud, bigamy, or incest. Another reason could be that one party was underage and lacked parental consent. Alternatively, they never lived together, or one spouse was not mentally able to make the decision.
Annulments are not the same as a divorce. If someone does not meet the requirements for an annulment, they will have to file for a divorce. With an annulment, the marriage never happened. On the other hand, a divorce ends a marriage that was legally valid. Just like with a divorce, the parties are legally single. Because of this, the parties are able to get remarry afterwards.
Separation
A separation is not actually a way of ending a marriage directly. A separation occurs when a married couple makes a legal decision to live separate lives. This happens while thinking about or getting ready for divorce. This is not the same as if a couple decides to informally live apart. A separation does not allow for either person to remarry. This is because they are still both legally married.
In some states, the date a couple separated will determine how long they have to wait to get a divorce. Sometimes, couples work through their issues during this period. This can lead to them to get back together. Other times, couples decide to go through with a divorce.
As you can see, divorce, annulment and separation are 3 very different things. With divorce and annulment, the parties become single. On the other hand, separation is just a time period before a possible divorce takes place.
Oct 22, 2023 | Divorce, Family Law
It can be dangerous to get out of a physically abusive relationship. Abusers are often fueled by deep insecurities. When their partner threatens to leave or tries to walk out, it can cause them to snap and escalate their abuse. The first step is to gain the trust of somebody close to you that you can turn to if things are getting out of hand. It’s also important to do research and find where to go but to do it safely. Practice your escape and make sure you have a safe word for a friend if you need help. And finally, know where to go once you leave, like a shelter. Hopefully, you can get out safely and find the help you need to allow you to emotionally heal from your ordeal.
leaving a Physically Abusive Relationship Safely: Get Help
Find Somebody You Can Trust
One thing that can help you get out of a physically abusive relationship is somebody on the outside helping. Find a close friend or neighbor whom you trust completely. You can confide in them about what is going on and ask them if they would be able to help you if you needed it. Make sure and memorize their number in case your abuser has control over your phone. Establish a code word with them to use in case your abuser is attacking, so they know that you need emergency help.
Be Careful About Surveillance
If you are trying to leave a physically abusive relationship, one thing to keep in mind is to be careful about surveillance. Many abusers keep careful tabs on their partners. For example, they might go through your phone or install tracking devices on your car or computer. It is safest to research your escape on somebody else’s phone or computer. Try a local library or borrowing from a friend if you need to look up information about getting away from your abuser.
Practice Your Escape
It’s important to practice your escape from your physically abusive relationship. Know your partner’s schedule so that you might know a time when you’re alone. If you have children, practice with them as well. It’s best to leave when your abuser is away. Trying to confront them and tell them that you’re leaving often can turn dangerous. Memorize how to get to a safe location so that you can get there even if you have to leave your phone or computer behind.
Know Where to Go
Finally, when escaping a physically abusive relationship, know where to go. There are domestic violence shelters that you can find within your community. You can also head straight to the police or hospital to get help. If you are not ready for that you can go to a friend or close family member that you trust. Even if you don’t have a long-term plan of where to stay, that’s ok. The important thing is that you get out safely before the abuse escalates.
The idea of escaping a physically abusive relationship can be quite intimidating. It can often be dangerous as well. Abusers might escalate their violence when their partner tries to leave. Therefore, it’s best to have a plan in mind and prepare yourself in advance. And also to leave when your abuser is not at home. Find somebody you can trust and let them help you with your escape. They can be a haven to go to once you leave. Be careful about using your own devices to do any research. Practice your escape plan and know exactly where you’re going to go once you’re out. There are many support groups and help available for victims of abuse. Hopefully, you can get out safely and find some support so that you can move on from this painful relationship.
